Soft and Fluffy “NO”

by Aliona Lebed

No more

Dear friends,

For some people it is  much easier to agree with anyone on any subject instead of  forcing themselves to say “NO”.  They do not want to upset the other person, who is desperately trying to sell something that you do not even need.  After all, he tries so hard. They did not want to offend loved ones again, it is easier just to agree.  After all, you have to be nice, soft, docile, feminine in the end. One has to live with all in peace and harmony.  Just need to please others.

Recall the time when someone rejected you last time. Try to recall the tone of voice and sharp  “NO”.   Oh, painful, very painful to accept such rejection.  Therefore, a person decides not to hurt others, ie not reject others, do not use “no”.

Imagine such a person has a child, a teenager for example.  He walks over to his mother asking:

“Can I buy 3 cakes instead of one?”
“I will take £200 out of your wallet ok?”
” I don’t feel like going to  school today, could I stay at home?”
“Could I have some money to buy something?”

Refusing and saying “no” is necessary not only for the benefit of another person, but first and foremost for yourself.

Shall we learn to refuse and reject, to say “no” in a graceful and beautiful way?

1. If you do not have the courage and are afraid to say “no” , then climb up on the stool.
Yes, as a child , when my parents asked me to read the poem for our guests, they put me on a stool . From such height a person feels tall, strong and sturdy. From there it is easier to say “no.” Practice.

2 . Tone of voice is  more upsetting than the content of the word “no.”
There is no need to kill a man with “no” as a  shot from a gun.  Stand in front of a mirror , and practice to say “no” softly and fluffily.

3 . Another effective method  is  not to make desicion straight away,  not to reply with “yes” or “no”.
It is better to take time out and think.  The phrase to use sounds: “Ok. Let me think.”

4 . Meanwhile, during a timeout , you climbed on the stool and practised.
Stand in front of the mirror and practice. And then the final stage.

5 . Go back to that person and tell him soft and fluffy “no”.

The video in this article will help you :

http://online.wsj.com/news/articles/SB10001424052702303795904579431093572107898?mod=trending_now_2

Wishing you successful training,

Aliona  Lebed

 

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